I Interview The Town's Salty Old Man

I've been working on a blog series for the local Chevy/Subaru/Cadillac dealership, Cascade Auto Center, and my first interview was with Wenatchee's resident "dirty old man" Harold Schroder.

Harold's a mostly-to-semi-retired, self-proclaimed "hustler" and he's not one to mince words.

He's been a bail bondsman, a real estate magnate and just about everything else one does when one buys low and sells high. We already knew each other because we haunt the same morning hotspot, Caffe Mela (another client of mine).

Now I've always been one of those people who gets along with older people famously – the "straight-shootin'" mentality and antiquated idioms intrigue me and older people usually like me because I love a good story.

So Harold and I get along.

Usually we sit at the bar and make small talk about life, love and ALWAYS, ALWAYS women. I'll cackle embarrassedly like a schoolgirl as Harold makes off-color remarks to the attractive baristas. He gets a kick out of harrying them like a fox gets a kick out of terrorizing the hen house. And I must admit – I live vicariously through him at those moments because a man my age would NEVER, EVER get away with saying the things he does (it's quite cathartic).

But the fact is – Harold's a really sweet guy. And if you take a moment to talk to him you realize it.

One thing many people don't know about him is how much he loved his late wife, Cathy. She died about six years ago and you can tell he misses her. It's kind of heartbreaking.

While preparing for this interview I was setting up the camera and chairs and such while Harold was talking to another old man, a friend of his who just happened to be at the dealership. They were talking about their recently deceased wives and I was struck by the intimacy of their conversation.

"How long ago did yours pass?"

"Oh, about six years now."

"Yeah, it's hard without 'em."

"Hell. It's hard with 'em! But there's not much to do without a good woman..."

Perhaps it was because of that pre-interview conversation that Harold wanted to inquire about my own love life. Which is bleak – to say the least.

But he persisted in asking about the details of my situation and so I told him. My last girlfriend was a smart but obstinate (part of the appeal really) lawyer and alas, she moved back to Seattle.

Thus, letting me off the hook in my mind. But Harold saw things differently.

He advised me to go find her, get her and marry her post-haste. In fact, his theory on marriage goes a little something like this: "Quick! Before she notices!"

In fact, he married his wife after the first date. He told me that he stole his beloved from, "Some dumbshit that didn't know what was happening." He took her on a date, she wouldn't sleep with him, so he asked her to marry him.

50-odd years, two kids, a family and a life later...

Here, watch our conversation for yourself:

"Is she smart?"

"Yeah."

"Why's she going with you?"

Haha.